This year, no matter what…

Decide to have the body you want.

No matter what 2020 brought. No matter the uncertainty of 2021. You don’t control any of that. You control you. Even when you think you don’t.

What’s possible for your weight and health in 2021?

If you base your answer on what you’ve done or haven’t done in the past, please stop. Your past doesn’t equal your future. Unless you let it.

It feels hard to believe that you can do something you haven’t done before. My clients always start out in some form of disbelief:

“After turning 50, I’d given up on losing weight,” said Teresa who lost and kept off 20 lbs. for over two years now.

“But I hate exercise, and I love sugar,” said Chris who’s down 23 lbs., and enjoys her regular walks and healthy eating, even leaving room for cookies 😊.

“I’ve never been able to lose any more than 20 lbs. before I put it right back on,” said Holly who’s lost close to 50 lbs. while still enjoying food and wine.

These clients didn’t use willpower. They changed what they believed was possible. One small step at a time.

Decide to have the body you want and keep weight off, no matter what. What’s possible for your weight and health in 2021?
Photo by Andrew Wilus from Pexels

I challenge you to do it, too. Ask and answer these three questions:

  1. What do I believe is really possible for my weight and body?
  2. What thoughts do I have most often about my body and ability to change it?
  3. What’s the most positive thought that I can believe about my body and my capabilities?

That last one is key. The goal isn’t to fake it. If a positive thought is too hard – doesn’t feel true – move toward neutral. Try something like this for a start:

  1. I’m not a fan of exercise (a move away from “I hate exercise”)
  2. My body might surprise me (rather than “I’ve never been able to keep weight off”)
  3. I’m open to making progress
  4. I have a strong body
  5. I can learn from my success in other areas to help me lose weight and keep it off

This is your starting point. It’s not what you eat, your exercise…any of it. (That was your focus in the past, right?) You’ll only be consistent with those actions – and I mean really consistent, not a few weeks or months – when you start out with the right mindset. And keep that mindset throughout all the hard stuff.

This is your year. Yes, you can do it this time. It will be worth it.

You never have to end up “back here” again. The actions are easy. You know what to do. Start managing your mind to get it done.

How to balance a robust professional and personal life

I listened to a recent interview with Susan Rice, U.S. National Security Advisor from 2013 to 2017. She’s been under pressure in a way that most of us will – gratefully – never experience. Yet each of us has our own pressures, which are no less significant.

What stood out to me in particular was when the interviewer noted how Rice had managed a complicated life with a great deal of elegance. She was asked about her hacks for managing a really robust professional career along with a robust personal life (marriage and kids).

I loved her response!

First, she said “No one does it perfectly or to their own satisfaction.”

So true. It’s easy to see someone’s “outsides” and make assumptions. But honestly, we’re each doing the best we can in the moment (thank you, Brene’ Brown!). What if we decide it’s not supposed to be perfect and that’s part of the journey?

Then Rice acknowledged that along the way she learned there are certain things we can control. And that those are the ones we should focus on.


I love that she started with mindset. Simply put, “I can’t do it perfectly, and that’s okay. I will focus on what I can control.”

However you balance self-care, remember there’s no "perfect." Thinking there is can cause as much stress as whatever else we think!
Photo by Gustavo Torres on Unsplash

That’s 80% of the battle, my friends. The stories we tell ourselves control our lives. Ruminating on being busy and overwhelmed, regret of past decisions, or feeling sorry for ourselves, are all unhelpful. And our results suffer. We suffer.

Reworking our mindset is the most effective tool to change our behavior and get the results we want.

Rice continued, “I really tried to take care of myself. To sleep as much as I reasonably could. To exercise as much as I reasonably could. And to prioritize time with family and friends, because that was rejuvenating time and gave me…the strength and perspective to deal with the things I couldn’t control.”

Notice that when asked for hacks she didn’t mention a productivity app or how to get more done in less time. She went right to the foundation of what’s essential to operate at the highest level: Self-care.

Maybe you make self-care a priority. But if not, brainstorm all the ways you might begin. (And if you sometimes think self-care is selfish, take a peek at last month’s blog.) How can you take care of yourself to do all that you have in front of you?

Wherever you are on the scale of self-care, remind yourself there’s no perfect. The idea that there is “perfect” can cause as much stress as whatever else we think! If anything, start imperfect and know that it all counts. Start with mindset. 😊

Share below your #1 self-care habit.

8 Quick & Easy Ways to Kickstart Feeling Better and Getting Fit.

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