Our brains are funny. They look for what’s going wrong. For what might happen. For what we’re missing out on. Hence FOMO, a widespread phenomenon in our culture.
Fortunately, we’re starting to see a shift away from the frenzy this brings, towards something life-giving. Enter JOMO: The Joy of Missing Out.
But we still linger on the fear a bit. Even if we better manage our use of technology. Even if we no longer care about what the Joneses are doing. We still…
…wait for the other shoe to drop.
…second-guess ourselves.
…look for outer confirmation that we’re doing the right thing.
…want to make the correct decision.
…think something else would work better than what we’re doing.
These little fears slowly chip away at joy. But they seem reasonable, don’t they? Of course, you want to make the right decision. Take the best action. Maybe you could have done something different and made a better choice. If you just research a little longer. Ask one more person.
It’s exhausting.
Like the woman who reads every fitness magazine and online article looking for a better workout routine, diet plan or the latest super food. Downloading app after app that tracks and notifies her of all the things. Five days go by and she hasn’t lost enough weight, whatever that means, and she’s onto the next thing. Always searching for the answer.
What if you let go of the fear? Of the idea that there’s some perfect decision or right answer? What if you held firm to your decisions and simply decided you made the “right” one? What if you really commit to a plan of action to see what’s possible?
Can you feel the exhale?
I came across a site dedicated to “the joy of missing out on the right things.” I particularly love #2 of the JOMO manifesto: “Let us be the ones who spend our time well; who live every hour of every day.”
Imagine the joy of missing out on comparing, doubt, second guessing and agonizing over decisions!
What does it mean to you to “live every hour of every day?” For me I think about my core values of connection, vitality, authenticity, beauty and fun. When I ask how every hour can be infused with those, there is no space for the unhelpful things.
Sure, little inklings of fear will still pop up. You have a human brain, after all. But when you live from a place of your highest values, you can see it for what it is. Acknowledge it. And let it go.
Joy.