How do you decide whether to stick with your healthy habits or to give up? Does it depend on the situation, like whether someone brought cookies to share at the office? Or if it’s raining at the time you planned to go biking?
Actually, it doesn’t. What it really depends on is…
What it really depends on is whether you have a growth mindset or a fixed mindset. In other words, when you mess up is it an opportunity to grow or is it a reason to claim defeat?
This topic is particularly pertinent to children as what they learn when young will impact their future mindset. But while parents are concerned about instilling grit and resilience in their children, as adults we often practice these traits selectively.
Consider how you react to different mistakes:
Say you forget about a lunch date with your friend. You probably feel bad about it, apologize and move on. Maybe you figure out how your schedule went awry and change your process for going forward.
What if you sleep in, never hearing the alarm, and miss your workout? Can you move on with the same ease as the missed lunch? Or does it confirm your belief that you can’t stick with an exercise routine?
Or, consider the same failure viewed differently by different people. Two women overeat one night at dinner. One sees it as a momentary lapse and gives herself grace. She uses the experience to be more mindful in the future. The other sees it as confirmation that she has no willpower and beats herself up. The next morning she thinks “what’s the use…I blew it last night” and proceeds to grab a pastry and cafe mocha on the way into work.
The defining moment is how you interpret the mess up!
Do you want to stick with your healthy habits? Then you must rethink what you make these kinds of situations mean. And the longer your way of thinking has led to you giving up, the more effort it will take to rethink for a different, better result.
Do not say to yourself, “this is just the way I am.”
I get it. If you’ve behaved in a certain way, day after day, for years, it doesn’t feel optional. But growth is continual. It’s a choice. We don’t stop growing because we’ve reached a certain age.
So, when you notice that you’re making excuses based on circumstances, practice new ways of talking to yourself. Ask yourself questions that build resilience and cultivate a growth mindset, moving you forward to achieve your goals.
That’s what a healthy hottie does.